mayfield_logs | Not What She Expected

Entry tags:

Not What She Expected

Who: Remilia Scarlet and Patchouli Knowledge
What: Loss
Where: Patchouli's Room
When: Friday 20th April
Warnings: Denial, Grief

There was a knock at the glass of the window to Patchouli's bedroom. Outside, Remilia was hovering in place with an oddly contemplative look on her face.

"Patchy... are you in?" she asked, even if it was a bit of a silly question. Well, with how small her room was compared to Viole, and things like that witch getting her to branch out, perhaps she wasn't. Maybe she'd just forget about this and go do something else...

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

While she didn't get a direct answer... There was certainly a sound within the room. Were Remilia to glance, she'd find within the room her friend, sitting on her bed... flipping through a book. Not just any book, though. Not one Remi had seen her with.

No, it was a scrap book. But with Patchy's back turned, it was difficult to tell what she was doing with it.

Of course the vampire was peering around, trying to peek over Patchouli's shoulder at it, but she couldn't really see. She tried knocking again.

"Ooooi, Patchy...?

... A sigh.

"The window's open."

That was all the invitation Remilia needed, though she didn't burst in quite as boisterously as she might usually, slipping inside and quietly closing the glass behind her as she settled on the bed next to Patchouli.

"Sakuya's acting funny." A simple statement, casually said, but all the more telling for how little emotion or her usual confidence there was in it.

"Is that so?" She flipped the page again. It was the scrapbook she had gotten before Koa's arrival, filled with photographs of her familiar, of the entire mansion, of their 'family'....

"Are her possessions about?"

"Hmm? I didn't look," said the vampire, peering over at the scrapbook idly. "Ah, but she wasn't wearing her uniform..."

...

"Then she's gone. Just like Koakuma."

A pause. And then a forced little laugh.

"Ah, you mean like droned? Ah, this town can be really inconvenient... how long do you think before she turns back to normal, then?" Remilia asked earnestly, trying to pretend for all the world this was just a momentary setback.

"It took her nearly two years last time..."

Her voice went quiet. It was getting to be too much. Remembering all of that time spent alone, without them. Sakuya, Meiling, Remilia, Flandre, Koakuma... how long she'd been apart from them. And it was all starting to happen again. Her hands trembled.

"Two years..." She'd like to say time like that was a blink of the eye for someone like her, but it really wasn't. Not when each day was one without pieces of her family. Her own thoughts were interrupted when she noticed that trembling. "Patchy..?"

"It's happening again... You're all leaving again..."

She opened her mouth, an automatic response of bravado on her lips, only to close it again. She would never leave the wizard, but Sakuya would never leave her master... and yet she did. She... really had, hadn't she?

"...so they're really gone." Quiet, a slight trembling in her voice. She had been trying so hard not to acknowledge it, but whether because seeing Patchouli like that drove it home, or it seemed too insulting to pretend any longer when her friend was hurting like this, she no longer could deny it.

"I hate this place... I hate it so much..." The book dropped from her hands and she immediately turned to cling to her friend, holding her almost painfully close. She was afraid. She was afraid the moment she let go of Remilia, she'd be droned, just like the rest of them. She didn't want to be along again...

There was a moment of surprise when the magician turned to her like that, clung so tightly to her small body. She'd never seen Patchouli like this before. But it mirrored exactly how she was feeling inside, and that surprised was replaced by her own overwhelming and sudden insecurity, causing her to pull the fragile girl to her so closely.

"It's cruel... but they'll pay for it in time. I won't let them get away with this..."

"What can you do? What can any of us do? We're powerless to stop it..."

"No, I'll... I'll definitely come up with something!" It was a cry of frustration, desperate for some kind of hope to cling to. She was as much trying to convince herself as she was Patchouli, though the way she clung tighter to the magician was telling.

"Stop... please..." She couldn't take the speaking in absolutes, the senseless posturing. Not now.

"Patchy..." Those kind of statements, that bravado was all she had left though. Nothing else actually worked, after all... not when it really mattered. No matter what powers she regained back, they wouldn't be able to stop something like this from happening. "I just..."

"Just stay here... right now... It's just us. You don't need to act strong. I know you are. Just..." She didn't even know what she was saying any longer.

Remilia was at a lost for words as well, but she understood the librarian's feelings. A sobbing gasp escaped her throat before she buried her face against Patchouli's shoulder, clinging tightly, holding her close, afraid to let her go.

They shared their tears, their despair. Like that, their family was incomplete again. At any moment it could change. For better or for worse. Thoughts like that, they... they overwhelmed Patchouli. Perhaps if none of them had ever come back, she could have remained jaded...

Remilia never could have. For all her years of life, she was still such a child in so many ways, and dealing with loss was not something she was used to. It made her feel weak, powerless. Something she hated, that would cause her to rebel, but later. Right now it was all too crushing, and she simply wanted to cling to what she had still.

"I hate this place... I hate it so much... I hate what's become of us..."

Hearing Patchouli save that really drove something home in Remilia. It had been a long, long time since she'd last heard the quiet librarian speak of hating something so seriously.

"I do too... This place... this feeling of powerlessness..."

She hated it more so than anything she had truly despised in the past. More so than the people that took her parents away, more so than her weak body, more than anything. It felt consuming, dire, and...

"What are we going to do?"

A pause. A moment as she set aside the bravado and answered with honesty.

"...I don't know."

... But that was okay. Because...

"I don't either... At least we're equal in that."

She clung closer, wings trembling lightly.

"...can I stay here tonight?"

"Absolutely... It's been a long time since we've shared a bed, though. And it's a bit small..."

"It's okay... I want to be close tonight."

Patchouli nodded, fully understanding.

"I should... let Meiling know."

"Mm... I'll come with you," the vampire said, loosening her grip on the librarian so they could sit up, but not letting go entirely.

Patchouli readily offered her hand to be held. They were probably going to be inseparable the rest of the night.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Not What She Expected

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject