Threads Severed

[fated_blade]

Who: Saber and Enkidu
What: Moping about failed relationships :(
Where: The Park
When: Backdated to early January
Warnings: can't think of anything...?

She sat as if in a trance on a bench. It had been weeks, and finally she had managed to leave her house.

This feeling of heaviness was something alien and strange; what was this? Sadness, yes, but it was far deeper than anything she had experienced before...or at least in a very long time.

It was bad enough when he abandoned her to live elsewhere...but now he has abandoned her completely. Even if he did regain his senses it was entirely possible he would not be the same man, and that made her heart ache.

It had been hours since she'd sat down, and she didn't feel the cold anymore, but a light layer of snow covered the top of her head and shoulders. She tried to will herself to stand, but she found she would rather remain exactly where she was.

Comments

[trapofthewilds]

To have the things that you had cherished taken away from you... to have the things you loved so much only to slip away from your fingers so easily.... that's what truly hurt him. Compared to the punishments of the gods from his first life, this feeling was too much.

First, the two girls whom he had grown attached to and even call them his own daughters... gone. Second, the woman he had came to love and be a Servant for during the times they had been together, only to be gone. And now... his brother, the King of Heroes, the very man he truly loved like his only remaining family was stripped away from him.

One heartache after another, one little bit of happiness only crushed, and one glimmer of light that he had to keep himself whole... all gone. Truly, the Gods of this world are the cruelest things to exist. And at this point, the tears inside him were all dried up. For hours before, the cries were endless and no one to confide to. But now... now, in the brisk and crisp weather, he had ventured out to clear his mind. To throw away any attachments he had and go find his Master after-- only to see a lone familiar woman on a bench.

... and all he could do his weakly brush the snow off her head and shoulders while giving her a very weak smile and even weaker tone. "You shouldn't be out here alone, Saber. It would be very unsightly to see a woman such as yourself to catch a cold."

[fated_blade]

She didn't look up at him, but when she spoke her voice cracked as if she hadn't used it in awhile.

"I cannot catch illness as I am...unless the gods of the place decide otherwise...which I suppose they could."

After a small pause of silence, she spoke softly again, "I cannot even bring myself to cry."

[trapofthewilds]

He couldn't fault her for it, nor did he feel any disrespect when she had not raised her head to speak to him. There was no doubts in his mind that she is feeling the same thing he feel for the exact same reason as well.

"I see... then in that case..."

That's when he brushes away the snow on the bench so he would sit down next to her. His eyes continued to stare at the snowy scenery before he could nod at her last remark. "Mm. I believe all of my tears are gone now... the moment I realized it, I couldn't stop. But now... now I feel so empty."

[fated_blade]

"I cried as a child...I shed tears for my country...but this pain feels so deep I..." She shakes her head.

"Forgive me...I do not deserve to mourn him so..."

[trapofthewilds]

"Before you are a King, before you were a knight, and before you were even thought to be a heroic spirit, you are still a human woman with human feelings."

He closes his eyes and brings his knees up close to his chest.

"There is no need to ask forgiveness unless those words you had claimed to have feelings for him were false. Only then would I be offended and say you have no right... and even if that were the case, I am not in the mood for an argument. Not now. Not after what has happened."

[fated_blade]

She shook her head again with her bangs hanging over her eyes. Her hands trembled slightly, and her voice trembled.

"I could never...I loved him...I did. I never loved anyone the way I...I shared myself with him...I always wanted to be...and now he is gone...I am hurt...but more than that I feel like a fool."

[trapofthewilds]

He reaches over to place an arm around her shoulders. Just a light hug and a gentle gesture of him understanding completely.

"I know... I know. My brother cherished you a lot, just as you did with him... but Saber, I do understand your feelings. I understand it better than anyone else. But as much as we grieve, as much as we weep... there is no room for regrets. To call yourself a fool... are you saying you are a fool for experiencing such happiness in your life that, as you said, never had loved in any other way?"

That's when he opened his eyes and gave her a small, warm smile. "If it is foolish to have a heart and acknowledge what I feel, then so be it. I will be a fool with you."

[fated_blade]

"I am a fool for thinking I was allowed to be happy...I really thought we...I wanted..." And that's when the first sob came through.

"But he was taken...I should have known better...I regret only that I could not tell him goodbye..."

[trapofthewilds]

"Everyone has the right to be happy. Everyone, do you understand?" And it was odd, despite he himself was nothing but a ball of weeping mess just recently and has yet to truly accept things as they are, perhaps this is more like convincing himself more than her. "But... to feel that they had left before you could say one final thing, it is a fate I know all too well. My daughters, my lover and now my brother."

But that's when he takes a deep breath in and opens his eyes again to gaze at the knight-king. "Saber... tell me, your boy. Does he make you happy at all? Does he still fill you with a light that could never be found here?"

[fated_blade]

"I love him with all my heart. I am terrified to let him see me like this...to be a disappointment. He relies on me...I..."

She couldn't speak anymore. The tears she had been holding back for weeks finally pushed their way through and she held her face still trying to fight it.

"I am afraid to let my heart be open to anyone again...even my son."

[trapofthewilds]

"Don't be."

Those words were more forced and stern than the rest of his tone. That was when his offended glance and upsetness had came in.

"I don't know what you may think about my brother, but Gilgamesh would like his woman to be more stronger than that. Don't hide your feelings, don't run from yourself... that would be the greatest insult to him of all. To see the woman that he prized so much only to cower away and be weak to move on in their lives. Not even I would do that to my brother... and neither would he with me."

He glances up to the drifting snow and exhales a sigh. "You have your family. You have your friends. You still have people who care for you, Saber. Don't make the ones who care for you and cared for you before be the fools thinking there is a woman who can't be happy no matter how much they put themselves out for you."

[fated_blade]

In an instant her cries stopped and she stared at the ground horrified. He was right, she was being pathetic and Gilgamesh would have just laughed at her.

Quickly she wiped her eyes and forced herself to regain her senses. "Forgive me" was all she said.

She had made a bigger fool of herself. This was not the woman that he had loved, and she was insulting him with her behavior.

[trapofthewilds]

At that point, Enkidu slowly made it to his feet and brushed off any of the accumulated snow that had began to pile onto his white clothing before turning to glance over his shoulder at Saber.

"I'll only forgive you if you can truly prove to me that you can walk on from the past. To show me that you can stand on your own two feet and challenge whatever fate throws at you next. That is what we heroes are known for... that is what makes us a legend. Stand up, Saber-- no, stand up, King Arthur. If you wish to make my brother smile, show him and me that you can still face even the heartaches of life and love and keep on going even with the pains. We are not creatures to break down so easily, and when we do? We get back up even stronger than before."

And with that being said, he began to make his bare feet leave footprints on the snowy ground.

"When I lost Satori and Koishi, I vowed to never forget what they meant to me. They will always have a place in my heart, no matter what this town may do to me." And another step. "When I lost Keine, I vowed to challenge the gods of this world for playing with the lives of us people here and will strike the moment I see an opening." And then one more step, turn and facing Saber once more. "And once I had lost Gilgamesh, I vowed to stay true to my beliefs and ideals. Our beliefs and ideals with no regrets with this only path ahead of us, no matter in what era we walk on this earth. We will be together again, and we will see to it that there will be nothing that will stand in our way to separates us again. The gods, the world... nothing. I will stand on my own two feet, I will move with my own strength and I will go on with or without them. If I failed myself, then I failed them. And I won't accept failure in any manner."